It’s basically accusing her of cultural appropriation, just for wearing a t-shirt she likes.
The question implies skepticism that she is an authentic fan. It’s a form of gatekeeping, based in misogyny and rigid social conformity.
Even if she doesn’t really know iron maiden’s music, so what? It’s perfectly reasonable to choose your shirts based on styles and colours you like. I wore a Popeye the sailor t-shirt yesterday, I would not be prepared to talk about my favorite episodes.
In what reality is it important to check someone’s card. You can ask anybody wearing a shirt what their favorite song is or if they’ve seen them live. That’s actually acceptable, because you’re interested in their subjective experiences.
Publically announcing to someone that you want to out-group them over a trivial matter is not.
I disagree that gatekeeping is either of those things. I also don’t think it’s unreasonable to ask people not to publicly associate themselves with a thing if they know nothing at all about that thing.
Gatekeeping isn’t inherently misogynistic or conformist, but the motivations in cases like this probably are.
I also don’t think it’s unreasonable to ask people not to publicly associate themselves with a thing if they know nothing at all about that thing.
Nobody owes anyone an explanation of how entitled they are to wear a band’s t-shirt.
I’ve listened to enough iron maiden to know that I like the band, but could only name one song off the top of my head. Do I have your permission to wear their t-shirt?
You’re channeling the same energy as someone that feels entitled to know about a stranger’s genitals if their bone structure seems misaligned with the gender they’re presenting.
It’s so easy to not be an asshole watch this:
Slayer fan:
Iron maiden! Nice! I saw them play at XXXX back in XXXX. It was a wicked show.
Iron maiden fan:
Oh wow, that sounds so fun! I’ve just learned about them, but I’d love to see them in concert someday. The metal community is so welcoming!
Or:
Oh wow. I don’t really listen to them, but they were my cousin’s favorite band, she died recently, so I wear this shirt when I’m missing her.
Or:
Oh wow, I was at that show too!
Or:
my uncle is the drummer and is always giving me these
Or:
Uh huh? I just like the colours of the shirt.
Life is so much better if you don’t make nasty assumptions.
Gatekeeping really is not either of these things, but people can wear whatever they like. I can’t say I get why someone would do it at all, but not my problem.
There’s a huge difference between using it as a conversation starter and asking about their favorite songs or whatever, since it’s reasonable to assume they know and like the band, and going “name 3 songs” because you assume they don’t listen to the band and also somehow care about that.
She doesn’t owe him anything.
It’s basically accusing her of cultural appropriation, just for wearing a t-shirt she likes.
The question implies skepticism that she is an authentic fan. It’s a form of gatekeeping, based in misogyny and rigid social conformity.
Even if she doesn’t really know iron maiden’s music, so what? It’s perfectly reasonable to choose your shirts based on styles and colours you like. I wore a Popeye the sailor t-shirt yesterday, I would not be prepared to talk about my favorite episodes.
What if she was a man instead?
In what reality is it important to check someone’s card. You can ask anybody wearing a shirt what their favorite song is or if they’ve seen them live. That’s actually acceptable, because you’re interested in their subjective experiences. Publically announcing to someone that you want to out-group them over a trivial matter is not.
The same holds true? Can’t be that hard not to be an asshole.
I disagree that gatekeeping is either of those things. I also don’t think it’s unreasonable to ask people not to publicly associate themselves with a thing if they know nothing at all about that thing.
The bar is on the floor here.
Gatekeeping isn’t inherently misogynistic or conformist, but the motivations in cases like this probably are.
Nobody owes anyone an explanation of how entitled they are to wear a band’s t-shirt.
I’ve listened to enough iron maiden to know that I like the band, but could only name one song off the top of my head. Do I have your permission to wear their t-shirt?
You’re channeling the same energy as someone that feels entitled to know about a stranger’s genitals if their bone structure seems misaligned with the gender they’re presenting.
It’s so easy to not be an asshole watch this:
Slayer fan:
Iron maiden fan:
Or:
Or:
Or:
Or:
Life is so much better if you don’t make nasty assumptions.
For fuck’s sake, what’s nasty about the assumption that someone wearing a band’s merch likes the band?
What people choose to associate themselves with in public is exactly fuck all of your business. Don’t be like the meme guy, tend to your own garden.
Gatekeeping really is not either of these things, but people can wear whatever they like. I can’t say I get why someone would do it at all, but not my problem.
There’s a huge difference between using it as a conversation starter and asking about their favorite songs or whatever, since it’s reasonable to assume they know and like the band, and going “name 3 songs” because you assume they don’t listen to the band and also somehow care about that.