…ideally one that was both genuine and that you had the confidence and self awareness to interpret as kind. And for bonus points, what’s one you’ve given?
I’m thinking back to the guy in group therapy years ago who told me he always thought of people who swore as not knowing any better words, but that I obviously knew better words and just also swore and even used them artistically and that’s just really stuck with me. Sometimes I wonder how much of my self esteem has suffered not just because I’ve been told not to brag, but also because I’m extremely weird so the compliments I do receive often reflect that.
My bonus one (and I’m not sure how well he was able to take it) was that one of my fellow psych nurses was frequently and obviously terrified any time shit hit the fan, but that somehow still he’d never once failed to have my back. He’d be stuttering the whole way through an incident but I’d walk out of the med room with both halves of a B52 and he’d take one of the syringes without a second thought. He was literally the epitome of “courage isn’t not being scared, it’s being willing to face it.” I should find a nice presentation of that quote somewhere to send him because I’m not sure I phrased it well at the time.
I was told my calves were absolutely shredded by an attractive woman. I’ll carry that to my grave.
Oh some people have some absolute upside-down shelves on their legs. (Dunno about you but) especially fat people. A lot of people don’t realize how much muscle is under there unless they’re big enough to profoundly affect their mobility and that doesn’t usually start happening until around like 350+. There’s a reason Olympic weightlifters don’t look shredded (except them calves). Shredded muscle, especially abs, is almost all for show.
I used to be 300 and now I’m much closer to 200 (under if I’m careful) and I bike a lot. My calves and thighs are chiseled.