This has been happening at 12 Steps https://unherd.com/2023/05/how-alcoholics-anonymous-lost-its-way/ for awhile. And I’m sad to report that the recovery organization I’ve served as a facilitator with since 2014 (SMART Recovery)has also been derailed from our mission, after making the unforgivably foolish decision to elevate our first DEI coordinator-a man who’d only been a facilitator at the local level, from 2017 to 2020-to the office of Executive Director in 2022. Once there, he wasted no time pulling the sort underhanded jackassery that’s by now rote among Woke Warriors of all stripes, by sending out the following newsletter, encouraging every SMART meeting on the planet to forego rationality and empiricism, in favor of embracing idiocy and prejudice:
"Considering Power Dynamics in Our Meetings
First in a series of a communications about Empowerment from Executive Director Pete Rubinas
Power dynamics exist any time human beings gather in community with one another, and our self-management mutual support group meetings are no exception. Noticing and attending to the power dynamics that exist in our meetings is critical as facilitators. Not doing so is a barrier to empowerment that we should all be concerned about if we want our meetings to be safe places for all participants to pursue their recovery journeys.
What do we mean by power? In this context, we are referring to the real and perceived agency that one has over one’s own life and circumstances. There are a variety of factors that help to determine the relative power that an individual perceives in a given situation. Consider these examples:
Accumulated Recovery Time
Closeness to the Facilitator
Financial Security
Relationship Security
Education Level
Gender
Gender Identity
Sexual Orientation
Race
Age
Physical Health and Ability
Mental Health and Ability
History of Trauma
While there are no absolutes as we consider the relative
power of individuals in our meetings, we generally learn enough about participants to be able to recognize when an interpersonal situation is occurring between individuals that are not equally “powerful” at that time. It is crucial in those situations that we, the trained facilitators, intervene as necessary to reinforce the agency of the less powerful party to describe their experiences in their terms without judgment from other group members. If a participant is new to the group, we should assume that they are at a relative power disadvantage simply as a newcomer.
Telling new or less powerful participants to use a SMART tool or how to use a SMART tool in response to a share is NOT what we are trained to do when a participant shares something vulnerable with the group. Instead, we should validate the person’s experience, ask how the group can provide support, and use our motivational interviewing skills to explore the share with the participant if they are interested in doing so. If a fellow participant, especially a more powerful participant, invalidates a person’s share, we should remind them that we don’t give direct advice in SMART Recovery and proceed with the steps above.
SMART Recovery is an incredible tool for empowerment when it’s implemented in a way that respects that not every person is starting off on a level power playing field. I hope that you’ll join me in reflecting on this topic with an open mind in the spirit of continuous improvement and wanting SMART Recovery to not just be accessible to all, but also empowering for all. Peace, Pete Rubinas (he/him/his)"
I’ll put forth a point by point refutation of this nonsense a bit later. For now though, I’m curious:
Has anyone else been to a support group lately, only to discover that everyone present is hesitating to say much of anything, for fear that they’ll be labelled “problematic”? Has anyone found that the discussion frequently isn’t even focused on the most effective ways of resisting our addictive urges, and instead veers off into babbling about Privilege/Systems Of Power/Structural Injustices/Marginalized People/Toxic Masculinity?
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As a recovery facilitator for a decade, hopefully you would have developed some skills in empathy. Everyone is approaching their sobriety journey from a different place, and it’s reasonable to assume that their world view and lived environment is foundational to their story.
It’s unfortunate that you are feeling personally attacked by the recovery community striving to be inclusive of all who struggle in different ways than you do. What happened to “look for the similarities, not the differences”?
It’s not lost on us that saw you share your vitriol this morning, have it summarily rejected by reasonable minds, then go shop around for affirmation in different circles. If this is your idea of creating a safe space recovery, maybe you should reconsider your role. I’m sure there’s a place for you somewhere, but I imagine your politics are blinding your ability to help others progress on their journey. You’re not the leader you think you are.
“What happened to “look for the similarities, not the differences”?”
Ask that of Peter Rubinas, author of that newsletter and current Executive Director of SMART Recovery. By encouraging us all to jump to conclusions about one another based on traits such as our complexions, gender, and sexual orientations, he and the handful of activists who’ve infected so many organizations throughout America is promoting a focus on our similarities rather than our differences
I encouraging you to dig into this notion of empathy, before venerating it as an incontrovertible force for good https://www.vox.com/conversations/2017/1/19/14266230/empathy-morality-ethics-psychology-compassion-paul-bloom
What do you mean by “woke”?
By “Woke” I mean “Prefered pronoun using, Safe Space loving whackadoodles, who are moronic enough to believe that their fighting racism/sexism/homophobia, by constantly putting things like skin color, gender, and sexual orientation front and center. This, instead of approaching each person as an individual, and not jumping to conclusions about them”
This, instead of approaching each person as an individual
You literally started this comment by complaining about pronouns. You clearly do not practice what you preach. If you did, you wouldn’t consider having basic respect for others to be “woke” …You’d just consider it a common courtesy like the rest of us at the grown-ups table.
Those who lean Woke are, I’ve noticed, prone to misusing the word “literally”. Almost as often as they misuse “problematic”, “fascist”, and “weaponize”
Those who lean Woke are, I’ve noticed, prone to misusing the word “literally”.
Lets take a look at your definition, shall we?
By “Woke” I mean “Prefered pronoun using,
You literally began the definition by mentioning preferred pronouns. I didn’t misuse the word. But now you’ve got me curious. What exactly do you think the word ‘literally’ means? Please be specific. And then use it in a sentence.
Take your bigotry over to X. We don’t want it on lemmy. Kthxbye
Hurling the hot button word “bigotry” at someone who’s said something you object does not a cogent argument make. That’s eerily reminiscent of The GOP hurling the word “treason” at those who voiced skepticism over the invasion of Iraq during The 2000s
Funny how you have the time to respond to this comment but have ignored mine. Allow me to repeat myself, what do you think the word “literally” means? You’ve had an hour and a half to think about it lmao
If your belief in this is so strong.
Why did you delete the post you made in stopdrinking a few hours ago?
Was it the fact that your views were rejected by every commenter or something else?
…And it seems to be happening here again.
Will you delete this post as well?
“Please be aware of the power dynamics in your group and ensure that everyone in your meeting feels able to express themselves and has an equal chance to be heard.”
That seems extremely reasonable, actually?
That’s not what Rubinas says in the email. He explicitly encourages facilitators and participants alike to put things like skin color(Hell, he uses the word “race”, even though, biologically, this is a fiction), gender, sexual orientation, etc front and center in our interactions, instead of focusing on our shared humanity. THAT’S unpardonably racist/sexist/homophobic/ableist, etc etc
As a swarthy complexioned child of immigrants to The US, I’m disgusted by the fact that an organization I’ve served since '14 is now encouraging straight, rich people who happen to be fair-skinned to jump to conclusions about those of us who happen to be a few shades darker than themselves
