• Kuma@lemmy.world
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    12 days ago

    Why?

    I think it has worked pretty well so far. You should never follow a rule strictly, it isn’t law after all. But as a rules does it work. The few times I didn’t follow it when I should did it bite me in the ass later.

    A good example when it works in my favor to follow the rule: I am always on time or a bit early and all my friends who usually are late when meeting other friends are never late when we meet up, especially when it isn’t a group meet up.

    • Call me Lenny/Leni@lemm.ee
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      12 days ago

      Having weighed all the times the gist of it made sense versus all the times the gist of it didn’t make sense, I have found the latter happens more often for me. It is often synonymous with shifting burden, where you can’t do so much as use discipline without it being brought up. It is also often synonymous with projecting one’s interests onto someone else, since you are using yourself as a model. In this way, it is anti-negotiative.

      • Kuma@lemmy.world
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        11 days ago

        Understandable, but I can’t really talk for someone else than my self. My example was about me being on time and therefore most do the same because it was something I felt was mutual. I would never tell them that they need to change for my sake, if I would then it would be for our relationships sake. How can I tell someone I wish them to be on time if I am not?

        And ofc it is about interest, I want a harmonious relationship regardless what kind of relationship it is, to be respected then I need to respect the person back. It isn’t like I walk around and think about this haha

        But you did make me curious and I am still curious, so far can I only assume what you refer to.

        I think we are talking about different things. To me is It not meant to be used against someone but to better yourself and understand consequences of your own actions. It is mainly said to kids like you said. But it sounds like you hear it a lot in arguments which is not how I think it should be used.