But where’s the Cortado?
Half of this are wrong though
It’s a guide for stupid people written by stupid people. I bet they’ll call you “woke” if you order a cappuccino there.
Right, a flat white is definitely not white.
A latte is also a white coffee, and most baristas are going to think you want an americano with milk.
Excuse me, but I have had a lot of tea and I can confirm that it is not coffee.
Espresso is also not coffee.
Hmm, I don’t think I’d want to buy coffee from this place
Exactly … it’s the kind of place with one cheap coffee machine that buys the cheapest ground bulk coffee they can find and probably spike the grounds with a bit of salt to make it palpable for their regular customers who all don’t care about their coffee because they’ve been visiting the same place for over 20 years.
Was going to say, if my coffee shop doesn’t know the difference between coffee and an espresso, I’m not buying a coffee from them.
Espresso is coffee. And it’s not like they’re making the advertisement for themselves lol
In the same way that prime rib is ground beef
I’m not sure your comparison works
Quality shitpost.
I think it’s easy to point how this is pretty off in some ways, but if you think of it as being aimed at someone with no coffee knowledge, I think it’s not a bad overview of how that person is likely to experience those types of drinks.
as someone who knows fuck all about coffee i can confirm this is how i see coffee. The one thing i know is that i like milky carmel cappuccinos:3
Here’s a quick tidbit I always have in the back of my mind:
If it’s an Italian name, it’s espresso-based and if it’s a French name, it’s coffee-based.
Italian coffee, for example:
Americano - Espresso and water
Latte - Espresso and regular milk
Cappuccino - Espresso and steamed milk
Breve - Espresso and steamed half-and-halfFrench coffee, for example:
Café - Plain coffee, sometimes called Café Noir
Café au Lait - Coffee and regular milk
Café Cremé - Coffee and cream (or sometimes half-and-half)
Café Americano - Coffee and water, it’s the French version of the Italian style.What’s the difference between coffee and espresso? Coffee is brewed and steeped. Espresso is created by forcing water through very, very densely-packed coffee grounds using high pressure. Coffee is typically enjoyed in cups and espresso is typically consumed in “shots” because of the strong flavor.
Half-and-half is for cowards. Either cut the cream entirely or get full cream.
Is an Italian latte really with cold milk?
I used to work in coffee in Seattle and around there a latte is also steamed milk. The difference between a latte and a cappuccino is the amount of foam to milk ratio.
Latte is mostly milk with a topping of foam. Cappuccino is half foam half milk (and some people like even more foam in their cappuccinos).
Those terms are an American invention. As for Italy
- Latte = plain old milk. Can be cold or hot, it’s milk
- Caffelatte = probably the origin of the American “latte”, literally means coffee and milk, usually made and home with cold or hot milk and moka coffee
- Latte macchiato = big cup of milk, frothy on top, with a shot of espresso in it
- Caffè macchiato = espresso with a shot of milk, can be frothy
Interesting, thanks for the info! What is moka coffee? Mocha here means a latte with chocolate basically. Sometimes with whipped cream instead of foam.
Coffee made with a Moka pot
What you call mocha should actually be called Mocaccino, although it’s more similar to what we call Marocchino in Italy. They’re both derived from the “Bicerin”, a drink typical of Turin.
Marocchino is like a Cappuccino with powdered cocoa (mix the espresso and cocoa before pouring the milk).
Mocaccino is instead made up of three layers, a layer of melted chocolate, then a layer of espresso, then a layer of frothy milk.
Afaik they’re not massively popular in Italy, but here in the north I see Marocchino more often than Mocaccino.
PS: if you want to pronounce them correctly, “chi” and “che” are pronounced “ki” and “ke”, while “ci” and “ce” are pronounced “chi” and “che”.
I was just trying to keep things simple, but you’re right
Wow, I thought I was the only person who didn’t know anything about coffee!
Yeah, my partner has to explain to me what the difference is between two drinks at least once a month. I just know I like the sweet ones and hazelnut goes good with most of em
I’m sorry but an americano is half coffee half water. It’s not black coffee. Black coffee would be a “solo”.
My point is that a non-coffee drinker is going to drink that and think it tastes like black coffee. Their experience of it will be what’s on the sign even if that’s inaccurate.
Also just an FYI, an americano is espresso shots in water, not coffee. Similar to what you’re describing, but a little smoother.
espressocompressed coffeeCoffee^2
Coffee.tar.gz
tar -xvzf Coffee.tar.gz americano
For anyone that sees espresso and thinks express, as in something fast, it’s actually meant to be pressed, as it’s an Italian term. So that’s hot water that went through pressed coffee powder.
Espresso makes me Expresso.
So that’s hot water that went through pressed coffee powder.
The “pressed” doesn’t refer to the coffee powder but to the water: the water is pressed through the coffee grounds using high pressure (around 9 bars or so).
Ops, my mistake!
It also means express in italian. It’s a pun. The reason it was invented was to make coffee brewing faster so coffee breaks wouldn’t take so long.
You espress it?
Si
I will not be ordering a “chalky coffee”.
It’s a “choccy (chocolate) coffee”
Flat white, cappuccino, latte and machiatto are the same thing. It’s just coffee with milk.
All mammals are the same thing, just carbon life forms
Carbon lifeforms with milk. Get it right.
Pizza, cream cheese bagel, and cheese on crackers are the same thing. It’s just bread with cheese.
They forgot to list the Jackson, which is a coffee that starts out Black but turns White
This has been '90s comedy night, ladies and gentlemen! Thanks for coming and be sure to tip your waitstaff!
This is just bacon style marketing.
Espressoconcentrated coffeeThat’s just “Other nonsense” e.g. whats wrong with Tea and Hot Chocolate?
It isn’t coffee.
That’s about a -31 on the “what kind of coffee is this” scale.
They are coffee extremists, but from the other side of the spectrum.
Equally or even more annoying than the “Venti Caramel Ribbon Crunch Frappuccino, extra cream, pinch of pumpkin spice, …” crowd. Since that side at least doesn’t force their views on coffee on other people.
If I ask for a latte, and you give me a coffee with milk, I’m gonna be upset. There’s a big difference between steamed milk and just milk.
I ordered an almond joy latte and went back in asking for another drink cause it was horrible.
Turns out it was a coffee not a drink. I hadn’t had coffee in so long I couldn’t identify the lack of steamed milk. 🫤
I did get it remade as a latte and it was amazing.
If I ask for latte, and you give me a coffee with milk, I’m gonna be upset. There’s a big difference between milk and coffee with milk.
You do know that when you steam milk it changes the consistency, right? It’s like the difference between a coke and a completely flat coke.
Isn’t a latte non-steamed though? I thought a cappuccino had the frothed milk in it.
“Latte” is milk, “Caffè latte” is coffee with milk
In Italy, sure, but the sign looks to be from an American coffee shop, so “latte” doesn’t mean just milk in this context.
True, however - as I replied to a similar remark - the (presumably humorous) comment that keeps getting downvoted is technically correct
If by technically correct, you mean only correct if you mix languages, then sure. But afaik, this thread is in English.
Understood, but in the context of a coffee shop in an anglophone place it has a different agreed upon meaning.
True, however the (presumably humorous) comment that keeps getting downvoted is technically correct
A latte is espresso with steamed milk.
With a latte, it’s just normal steamed milk. A cappuccino has foamy steamed milk. Specifically, it has an equal volume of steamed milk and foam taking up space in the cup. You get more actual milk diluting the coffee in a latte, resulting in a milder drink.
Thank you for the correction.
I thought they were making a joke, in that latte means milk and that it’s “cafe latte” in Italy or something.
Yeah, I think they were, but also if I ask for a latte in an English speaking coffee shop and get a glass of milk, I’d be upset.
I thought flat white and latte were synonyms and they both meant milky coffee. Now I’m confused, so it’s just the foam?
Flat white is always made with some milk foam on top, traditionally less than a Latte.
So the difference should be in the ratio of coffee to milk to froth, which is also true of other varieties like cortado.
Flat white is 2 espresso shots and equal parts steamed milk. A Latte is more steamed milk (idk the exact ratio if there is one), most places just fill up whatever latte cup they have which should be bigger than the flat white cup, and has a small amount of head/foam.