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Fucking dweebs asking, “what was the incident in your school”.
The time an 8th grader cut his finger off.
Wood or metal shop?
History class.
Going to need some more details
Well, we were in history class and the teacher was talking about the revolutionary war. The teacher asked if anyone knew what types of guns the colonists used. Thats when the overachieving kid, stuck his hand in the air, desprate to answer. Well, the room had an old beaten up metal ceiling fan. And as he raised his hand more and more, the teacher ignored him. He wanted to hear from someone ELSE for a change. Well, he didn’t want to accept that he wasn’t going to get called on. So he’s raising his hand extra high. He starts almost standing, until the teacher said “Sit down, I KNOW you have the answer.” And the fan continued to keep us breezy on that June day.
That’s when there was some commotion in the hallway, and the class clown opens the door to play with them. Turns out it was two girls taking their shirts off. So now every 14 year old boy is rushing to press up against the door. Well his pinky was still in the doorway, because he was trying to play with them before EVERYBODY noticed. That’s when the door chopped off his finger.
Was this a New York school by any chance? I heard a story just like that before.
Cleveland, in 1998.
Kid was in history class, cut his finger off.
What more do you need to know?
The rest is history.
French Fries aren’t supposed to have bones…
Yes, but also why are you eating french fries covered in blood, found on the floor?
…because thats how we found his finger.
It’s striking to me to know that I was the kind of kid who could have easily ended up in a headline like this. I was not very impeccable with my word at that age, to put it mildly.
Girl who had a crush on me (and dumbass me was very slowly figuring this out) got in trouble in class for mouthing off, and when the teacher told her to go to the principal’s office she refused. He grabbed her by the arm and she kicked the teacher in the balls. HARD. I never saw her again. I think she had a number of issues. But damn, she was hot.
A neighboring school to me had a dean of students with an absolutely terrible relation to the students, and someone a few grades above me got a few weeks of out-of-school suspension for waiting for the very end of Spirit Day (when everyone was outside enjoying a popsicle, I guess the teachers thought they had the attention span of 6-year-olds) and kicking her into the grass. He’s still a celebrity for this.
Your balls thank you for never clueing in
Dodged a bullet. She had transferred in from somewhere. Pretty sure she was desperate for friends and was love bombing me. I was dumb and naieve.
Close! It’s naive
Thanks. Phone at early o’clock typo.
A 7yo girl peed on herself, after that incident we have put a weird nickname to her.
But there was also the other kid around 7 - 8 yo, who poop on himself, anyway these two was the incidents back then.
How old are you ?
Peepants and Shitbritches
kid trying to score points with the cool kids squeezed an orange section on the lowest kid on the totem. Lowest kid calmly stood up. Went over to the juice squeezing kid and suddenly started to choke the piss out of him then got a hold of himself and calmly sat down and finished his lunch.
squeezed an orange section on the lowest kid on the totem
Can you translate this?
An orange slice was squeezed above the head of the kid that was the lowest in the social hierarchy in order to cover them in juice.
yes. this is exactly what was done to instigate.
Lowest kid climbed 43 rungs that day, but probably never realized it.
Climbed rungs, hell…
He was removed from the ladder and placed into the “Don’t fuck with” elevator.
class was like high teens in size.
A student and her football player boyfriend were caught behind the school after a game making out and probably more. The girl was made to publicly apologize to the class and then “strongly encouraged” to leave and finish her high school somewhere else. The boy faced no public repercussions and appeared to carry on as normal.
Let’s call her “Jenny”. For about a year, any time someone pushed the line on public displays of affection per school rules, they were warned to tone it down or they would get “Jenny’d”.
Catholic school, in case you couldn’t guess.
Sounds like something out of My Life as a Teenage Robot.
Awful. Which decade did this happen?
Late 2000s
Knowing Catholic run schools this might as well have been last week.
Kid nearly lopped an arm off another kid with a samurai sword. Guess he was bullied and he lost his shit one day. Kid with the sword got help, and the kid who got cut didn’t lose an arm.
If I lived in a country with lax gun control, this would have been a much different situation.
Where does one casually get a samurai sword? Was he the hero of time?
A friend of mine recounts how in 1988 he flew home from Japan with a high quality katana as carry-on. Wrapped in a beach towel.
Remember there was a time before 2001 when Americans and everyone else flew differently, and there may be a number of katanas laying around from parents who traveled abroad and bought souvenirs and then tossed them in the attic without thinking.
Even in a Japanese setting, I didn’t know you could just buy a katana out of nowhere and freely carry it around.
It has to be an authentic samurai sword since they’re kid of a national treasure. If not, there’s specific rules about transporting it to and from your dojo and stuff.
Source: got my shit help up in Japanese customs when I had a very NOT ahthentic katana in my household goods. Went 3 months without my stuff
There were knife and souvenir shops in Spain that sold katanas. Don’t think they were sharp but I always wanted to have one when we went there on vacation. But they were too expensive. But we did get some shuriken, nunchakus (I got some padded ones because I was the younger child) and a butterfly knife.
For some reason my local thrift store had a few katanas and random other weeb tier weaponry at it.
Naturally my friend bought one.
I’d reckon from his parents, but I never saw the incident myself. You know kids in high school though. Spread a rumour and it catches like wildfire. I wouldn’t be surprised if it was actually a machete.
english teacher mysteriously left halfway through the year. rumors went around that she was messaging students outside of school. never confirmed for me. also freshman year our econ teacher married the gym teacher and she left over the summer to teach at another school
Similar thing happened at mine. Teacher was suddenly gone. Had previously won statewide awards for teaching.
Found out that it was from an inappropriate relationship complaint so they canned him. Found out much later that it was all one-sided, emails and texts showed he was telling her to stop. We lost a good teacher.
Kid got caught beating his meat in the school library.
My school had a kid do that in class under the desk. One of the more hated teachers in the school caught him and asked what he was doing. His reply, “Nothing if you don’t want to join.”
Ugh. We caught a kid doing that in my high school library last May. We radioed for help. The campus supervisor walked him outside, talked to him about it, and sent him back to us to finish the test he was working on. I couldn’t believe it. Later, we told admin about it and had to write witness statements. He was a freshman and said it’s what he does at home when he’s sitting around, and didn’t realize he was doing it. None of the students know, as far as I’m aware. We all kept it very quiet.
This was (and possibly is) a huge issue in a neighboring school. Someone would say he’d flip the health textbook to page 258 and focus on the attractive stock image person on the page. One day there was a confrontation about it that seemed to blow over when the person said “well it IS health class!”
A kid in high school got caught jerking off in the bathroom by the school principal. His full name became a euphemism for jerking off after that.
Someone in a neighboring school to mine did it in both Health class and French class, because the people pictured in the textbooks were attractive. The teacher for the health class one was very, very gung-ho about other peoples’ health (like he’d order you to go to the cafeteria to eat if you skipped lunch, that kind of thing), and after that, it became a running joke to ask him (the health teacher) if they could “improve their lower health”.
I’m more concerned about the teacher creeping on kids in the bathroom, wtf.
Bathrooms were shared back then between teachers and students. And when this happened, it was while class was ongoing, so he had very little expectation that he would run into any kids outside of class.
Back when I was in high school, it wasn’t uncommon for teachers to use the same restrooms as the students. I can’t quite remember but I think there were only a couple staff toilets on the campus, one in each gendered locker room and one in the front office.
Anyway, my point is there’s at least the possibility that the principal was just using the bathroom normally and the poor kid was being… less than subtle about what he was doing in the stall.
When I was at school teachers had to go into the toilets to stop fights and fetch kids who were hiding or being sick.
Not mine but my sister’s school - it was the first year the school was open and they had full length stalls in the bathroom. And then a couple months into the school year, a girl gave a boy a blowjob in one of them and of course they got caught. And that’s why the school got rid of the full length stalls very shortly after installing them. There were only a few hundred kids enrolled at that point, so of course everyone found out about it and any time someone mentioned that poor girl’s name for the next 4 years, it was, “oh the one who sucked [guy]'s dick?”
We have 2 major incidents
First one:
Dude A lends Dude B some money, relatively small amount, pretty sure it was less than $50. Dude B decides he’s not going to pay it back, so like mature, reasonable teenagers they decide they’re going to go to the park after school to fight about it.
Dude A is not a big guy, he asks Dude C who is a giant of a human being to come along just to make sure he doesn’t get killed, sort of a referee to pull dude B off of him if things get out of hand, not expecting him to step in or lend a hand or anything.
Dude B apparently has a different idea about how this is going to go down, and has a few friends come along with him with screwdrivers and baseball bats and other such improvised weapons.
Dude C sees this as they’re about to walk off the school property to fight, and does his job, takes these weapons, throws them in his bag, throws his jacket over the protruding bat, and they’re about to continue on their way.
The school, however, got word of this fight about to go down, and a bunch of cops show up.
Dude A lucks the fuck out and a passing senior he kind of knew pulls him into her car and assures the police that he wasn’t involved in this clusterfuck. None of the other kids give him up and he gets off scott-free and cops never figured out who the last unnamed party to this was.
The rest of them are all taken in, questioned, and receive their various punishments. Dude C gets the worst of it since he’s the guy who’s now holding all the weapons. He goes and spends a year or so at an alternative school, and is allowed to come back partially on the condition that he joins the football team. Our senior year we proceeded to win 0 football games, so fat lot of good having a giant on the team did.
Apparently dude C had misled his friends about how much money this was over, when informed by the cops that it was over like $40 he flew into a small rage, threw some things around, then calmly sat down and said “I have been misinformed”
Rumors of course start swirling and the truth gets very lost to the point I heard a version of the story where Dude C attacked the cops with a samurai sword and tried to flee on a motorcycle.
I’m pretty confident that this is a pretty accurate version of events though, a couple of the involved parties have all told me pretty much the exact same story, and it’s relatively unspectacular compared to some of the embellished versions I’ve heard. It’s also pretty much in line with what I know of their personalities.
For the most part, these kids weren’t dangerous, I don’t think any of them really had any other significant problems for the rest of their school career, and I’d describe most of them as nerds and generally decent people, some of them have some mental/emotional baggage, and couple that with some hormones and being stupid teenagers the stars just kind of aligned in the wrong way, and for the most part none of them held any significant grudges against each other and could probably have been considered friends to some extent afterwards.
Second incident:
I’m home sick one day, my mom worked at a school in our district, my sister was in school this day.
The phone rings, it’s an automated message from the district. Something about the district being made aware of a threat to the high school, but that everything is under control, there’s no danger, etc. not a lot of details.
Call my mom, she doesn’t have much more info than I do, she’s, not particularly worried, but of course a lot of parents panic and go to pick up their kids. She texts my sister to see if she wants to be picked up, she declines, she’s having a good time, it’s her and like 3 other people left in her class, they’re chilling and watching movies and such, there’s a news crew and some cop cars outside of the school.
Having nothing better to do, I’m going through all the news I can to figure out what’s up.
Eventually, it took a few days for all of the details to emerge, what we managed to piece together was
There was a kid who was planning a shooting, tried to recruit another kid who turned him in. Cops raided his house, found a bunch of airsoft guns, flea market swords, a half-built pipe bomb, and one gun (that his parents bought him) with no ammo.
This kid had been pulled out of school and was being homeschooled because of bullying. I didn’t know him, he was a few years younger than me, but from what I understand from people who knew him he was mostly bullied because he was an unlikeable racist asshole. The short bit of attention the media gave it tried to make it out like he was bullied for being fat (and let’s make no mistake, this dude was fat he may have been almost as wide as he was tall) but from the stories I’ve heard of him from before this happened, if any kid ever deserved bullying it was him for being such a major asshole.
I wouldn’t really mention his fatness, except that at some point during the trial and such, his mom (herself a very large lady) got in trouble for trying to smuggle him food, which was just icing on the proverbial cake.
The kid who turned him then went and broke into his house a little while later and tried to steal his Xbox or something.
That sounded like you were taking about Cartman.
You would not be the first to point out the Cartman parallels, it definitely crossed my mind while I was writing it out.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fab_Five:_The_Texas_Cheerleader_Scandal
They made this movie about it.
I actually knew a couple of those girls and they weren’t nearly that bad.
We had a girl in middle school who was raped by her uncle and carried the pregnancy to term and, IIRC, graduated high school. She was impregnated at age 11. The wealthy white girls who got pregnant were all disappeared as soon as it was known.
Rural Ohio, almost entirely white school - mid-to-late '90s. Bunch of kids decided to form kinda gangs. One wore cowboy hats and boots. I forget the other. Apparently, a bunch came armed to a football game for some kind of “gang war”. Thankfully, that never materialized, but I do know that some definitely came armed. WTF people. No non-whites were allowed in said gangs. (This brought to you by the town with white supremacists and anti-Semites who would say “that’s Jewish” to mean something was uncool).
Edit: both of these public school in the same school system.
