Let me preface this by saying I am a man, and smoked a little too much, so I’m sitting here thinking… what is or was the original purpose of a bra? Weight support? Vanity? Covering the nips so people’s eyes met your eyes and you can have a normal conversation? Like what’s it all about?
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My titties hurt when they bounce too much during hormone shifts. Plus the nipples are really irritating in A/C when they stiffen and feel wormy (dunno how to describe, like a small boner demanding attention) and I also accidentally scratch them without a bra to cover them. Was especially important to have some sort of coverage when I had piercings in them because I almost tore one out brushing my hair. Never healed right after that.
Ouch!
Fake. There were no women on lemmy. /s
Bruh we are here 😂
Simply responding due to our related names. The Frank part… Not the pooping.
Hi Frank 👋🏼
dunno how to describe, like a small boner demanding attention
as a guy i would imagine it’s much like that weird stage between semi chub and flaccid where your dick is just annoyingly erect.
Just kind of happens sometimes.
I think it’s much the same purpose that underwear serves for the testicles (and penis). As a man, I honestly can’t remember any time I walked around without underwear, but I’m pretty sure it would be worse than without. Things would just flail everywhere.
Other answers about bras are great but I thought the male flip side ought to be mentioned.
Meh. I went without underwear for a while. It’s kind of freeing when I’m at home, but those times I have to run out and forget to put on shorts or pants without a belt, it’s a little stressful lol. The first thing my wife does when she gets home is takes her bra off, so I ultimately guess it could be the same, but there’s no social impacts if men don’t wear underwear under their trousers when in public
A lot of replies here ignoring the obvious - patriarchy, religion, and capitalism.
There are plenty of examples of societies past and present, for the vast majority of the time humans existed probably, where breasts are free to exist as they are. The people those breasts are attached to do all manner of work and activities without hinderance, or chafed nipples. Just like those with flat chests do.
The reason that in (especially our western) modern world we are expected to wear bras has to do with puritanism, shame, control, and profiteering from all of the above.
Comfort is categorically not a priority of the billion dollar bra industry, the trillion dollar advertising industry, nor those who demand we wear them to be “respectable”, lest we “excite” their, or their son’s, urges or “distract” them from their important manly duties (and if we don’t, and they attack us, it’d be our fault for not being “modest” enough and “asking for it”).
When we have all been socialised with these demands and expectations for centuries, they become so deeply ingrained, it’s really hard to separate from our own free will, and yet ask any group of people who wear bras what the best part of the day is, and they’ll tell you it’s taking it off.
And to be clear - this isn’t a judgment of anyone who wears a bra, I wear an underwire once in a blue moon which I hate, but am usually in a sports bra because I feel more comfortable with everything held in place (and also have nosy neighbours I’m not that friendly with), it’s about questioning why I feel more comfortable that way, and how much of that is natural vs manufactured by a society that demands I keep everything held in place, and hidden (unless they’re “required” to sell something or entertain the mens).
Anyway, I’m stoned too and I tend to ramble, so I think I 'll leave it at that for now lol
ask any group of people who wear bras what the best part of the day is, and they’ll tell you it’s taking it off.
Nah fam. I can’t stand being without support unless I’m in bed. I’ve gotten used to wearing just an elastic sports bra at home, but I can’t stand being without underwire when I’m moving around a lot or out of my house. The bra does not come off until I put PJs on. (And even then, I’ve started sleeping in my sports bra more often than not.)
Getting my first properly fitted bra was life-changing. My chronic back pain dropped by about 70% and existence became dramatically more tolerable.
A lot of replies here ignoring the obvious - patriarchy, religion, and capitalism.
They’re not. OP is asking the actual point of them, and you’re bringing modern politics into it, which are a very recent development. “Bras” go way back, like thousands of years BCE, all with very different functions.
I mean no offense, but after all of the work women have done to get the rights and regards that they have today (don’t misunderstand me, there’s still work that can be done), and excuse my assumption, but it would be more or less the woman’s control of whether they would/should wear a bra, so the argument (I’m going to summarize to list to a single word. I mean no offense, but it’s my perception. Feel free to correct me if I’m wrong) of whether you should or shouldn’t is a feminist argument that feminist are the ones that argue about the most. However, I still believe “your body your right”. Do what you want.
However I had 2 ulterior motives for asking: 1) to actually know where and why bras were first used 2) the vast majority of people (cis, trans, straight, gay, men, and women) enjoy boobs. There are people on the planet that sexualize boobs, but boobs are a hot topic. People enjoy talking about boobs, and to me it’s a weird phenomenon. About the only exception I think to that rule would be gay men, but they can probably still appreciate a good pair of pups.
Again, I mean no offense. I just believe that some conversations about boobs are neither alienating or innapropriate. I hope I explained this in a way that isn’t creepy. If it does seem creep, please let me know and I’ll try to reword it
A lot of replies here ignoring the obvious - patriarchy, religion, and capitalism.
I’ll be honest, if you don’t have an understanding of how deeply these (along with white supremacy, cis heteronormativity, ablesim, classism) impact not only society at large, but our individual choices (or lack thereof), and it sounds like you don’t, I can’t really help at this point, there’s just too much to unpack and it’s not work I’m interested in doing for you.
As for your ulterior motives - the first is easy to resolve by opening a search engine and looking it up, the second absolutely makes you sound like a creep, and also provides a perfect demonstration of the kind of external pressure we face that more often than not compels us to cover up - we feel you “appreciating” our “pups” (aka your “male gaze” or simply you objectifying us). And it’s fucking gross.
Maybe you should read my first reply again, this time try and actually listen to the experience of a person explaining to you the pressures they and others like them face from society that you never have, instead of dismissing it because it makes you uncomfortable to confront, and then invest some of your own time actually researching the topic, not of why people wear bras, but of how fundamentally social constructs impact society and all the individuals in it, and maybe you’ll start to get an idea of what the actual answer to your question is.
But I have a feeling you’re not interested in doing any of that, so I’ll just leave you with this - boobs don’t exist for you.
Ok well, I haven’t attacked anyone and have made it clear that my own perceptions and beliefs could use some work. I haven’t used personal attacks. And I’m very interested in changing my perception… as long as those who perceive things differently are as respectful to me as I am to them.
So now for you specifically, here’s the deal. Your first argument to my first ulterior motive is you proving you are self-righteous because I posted this on “No Stupid Questiomlns”. Which makes you the asshole in this regard while I’m truly trying to learn. Second, you are the first person to have such an issue with my asking. So there’s a great chance that my line of asking isn’t the problem, but it’s you that’s the problem
I’m a small breasted woman who does not wear a bra. The reasons of practicality and comfort are described below for bigger chested people (I didn’t see mentioned that if they are really big and you try to run without serious, sometimes two sports bras on they can fly up and hit you in the face). I do sometimes accidentally hit my nipple on something, which I don’t like.
But in my experience, people get upset at seeing boob shaped boobs. Strangers tell me I should be wearing a bra. They want bra shaped boobs. Nipples are scary.
I haven’t worn one since middle school when it was new and fun and made me feel “grown up” (but uncomfortable). But some years back I got shingles and apparently permanent nerve damage on the nerve group that would be right under the bra band on my back and anything irritating it makes me feel like I’m on fire so it’s just not going to happen. Certainly not in the name of sparing the general public the scandal of seeing boob shaped boobs in a loose T shirt. At the very most I will use silicone tape to hide my nipples in very formal situations.
I’m not busty either, but I hate the feeling of my chest moving around or hanging. Sport’s bra’s are the only thing I wear. Even while sleeping.
I’m a man, and that’s how I feel about boxers and being nude. I don’t like that dangle feel of uncontrolled swaying on a sensitive part.
A kindred spirit. Saggy/floppy bodyparts man…
It’s very sexy to see nipples through clothes. I don’t know why but it’s just much hotter than seeing bare breasts.
Maybe people ask you to wear a bra because it’s making guys get distracted.
They do, but they shouldn’t. You should not ask a stranger to change their behavior because you cannot control your own. Maybe family would do it for you, but even then it’s can be a shitty thing to do.
You can’t ask guys to not get distracted. It’s not a choice they are making.
It’s not a choice they are making
It is if they’re friggin’ adults. Despite the media, we’re not supposed to be just led around by our penis’; unable to avoid being distracted by bewbs.
That’s a cop out that guys use as an excuse to not evolve.
Disagree, and you see the same thing in women when there is an attractive guy around.
This political correct bullshit trying to make people think it’s wrong to be attracted to someone is just ridiculous. :)
No one at any point said not to be attracted to that person. But that doesn’t mean people (men or women) should be drooling rutting animals about it.
In the adult world that (most of us) should have left behind after our bar-hopping twenties, finding someone attractive can be done without eye-fucking them like a creep.
You absolutely can ask them that. Noticing it is not the same thing as getting distracted by it. Allowing your focus to be highjacked by the environment is a sign of a weak mind. If you went to work and a coworker told you the shape of your nose was distracting to them, and you need to wear a mask so they can continue to work, that is on the coworker, not you. It is absurd to put someone else in charge of what needs to be done to stop you from being distracted.
People need to control themselves, no one else has that ability.
Won’t happen :) And disagree about the weak mind as well. Has nothing to do with mind, it’s hormones. Ask teenage boys to have their hands on their cover and exercise their willpower… :)
Ngl. I’ve hit my nipples on things and it sucks. My dogs have ran their nails across them and they burn for the rest of the day. I totally feel that pain
Curious why you don’t just ask your wife.
Good question! She said, and I quote “I don’t know. What the fuck is going on in your head right now?”
I’ve got a childhood friend who got a reduction because she had back problems after she went through puberty, and it basically led to her having chronic pain for a while in college. She’s WAY happier at a C-cup than whatever size she had before.
BOO
/s
Ackushually it’s Boob/s
People down voting you? Do they not realize this is a serious medical condition and does create back pain?
Horny porn brain mfers who don’t know how women’s bodies work.
I had a gf like that. It made total sense to me even though I never saw her before the reduction. She was quite happy with it as well.
Probably because it does nothing to answer the question and the only relating component is that your talking about boobs.
I intended on tying that into weight support, but I suppose that wasn’t terribly clear
My favourite part of threaded platforms is the arbitrary and tangential discourse
I wouldn’t have brought it up if they hadn’t asked 🤷♂️
You should probably tie it back into the actual question that OP had since I’m not sure everyone would make the connection between bras and what you wrote. I assume the other downvoters just hate the idea of a boob reduction.
Upvoted, friend. And happy your friend is doing better and is happier, but if a C is her happy place, how big were they? That sounds sucky
Someone already mentioned that cup size has no meaning without band size, but also want to help dispel the myth that D is a “huge” size.
The rule of thumb is that your cup size is the difference between the size of your rib cage and the size around your chest. Then it’s 1” per cup, with caveats and adjustments, but we’re talking basics.
So in reality a C cup is a 3” difference between ribcage and breasts. That’s pretty modest. However in media, it’s often played up that DD is your Playboy model size, but those are more likely to be a G cup or larger, at least if they were sized correctly.
Yeah I am a certified member of the itty bitty committee and am currently in a perfectly fit 34D, and my measurements would put me in 32DD.
Those letters just don’t really mean anything without the band size. Nobody, literally nobody, would look at me and think “D cup”.
Bras really need more than two measurements. I need the band of a 32-34, the wire diameter dimensions of a 34D and the volume of what I think of as a 34 B. I can find this in particular models of bras but it would be nice to have it on the label.
Friendly reminder that C cup has no meaning without a band size.
I have never needed one for support, but for the past 20, 30 years the US has had some sort of weird rule that only smooth lumps are professional, no hint of actual breast shape. That’s easing in non-professional public life, finally, so I don’t wear one a lot of the time, but at work wear something with light padding to make that weird Barbie doll lump shape.
Sports bra for running, yes that serves a practical function - holds the boobs still so they don’t bounce and hurt. So if one is more endowed and bouncing in everyday life, I imagine that a bra with structural support would be more comfortable than nothing.
I really wanted to answer that the point is right at the front of each cup!
It’s definitely a me problem, not a you problem, but I do find nips distracting. I’d like to get better at not being distracted by visible nips and I’m here for that journey.
I’m okay with being distracted.
If a woman wants to wear a short, short skirt to work, or no bras, then so be it. I will probably stare when no one is looking, but I will for sure remain professional otherwise.
What’s the difference between this scenario and having a mesmerizing painting in the common area.
Shit, I’m objectifying women!!!
Let’s just say that a dude with a good pair of biceps would be equally distracting, and I wouldn’t have an issue with that.
You don’t want to provoke the boomers with a young woman’s nips!
I wish I did have nipples that offended boomers, but I’m a cis straight dude
“offended”
Look bro, and I apologize if any of my language seems harsh. I’m still trying to figure out if you’re trying to be instigating with your correction. So instead of an argument where we both lose, were you trying to just be corrective and respective or we’re you just trying to be a grammar troll?
it was rather ambiguous, fair point
i was going for sexually uncomfortable as in predatory old man vibe
i can guarantee you one thing… me deff not a nazi grammar and my sloppy body of work is testament to that
I see. You have suggestions to reword it with sou ding creepy or should I just delete the whole thing?
not a suggestion for rewording, i think u/cheesymoonshadow did even better than my explanation.
Just highlighting that that “offended” is fake news for people who don’t understand boomer psychie
I’ll try and find their comment. You got a link by chance?
I sent a comment before this, but afterwards I realize I had an opinion on this. I’ll delete the first point, but would still like a link to who you were talking about. And my asking isn’t something that is going to offend me, but you feel it’s relevant thus my opinion is relevant to your opinion. Do you think I have an outdated perspective?
I took it to mean they meant that said boomers were only feigning taking offense but in reality enjoying the view.
No no no. Absolutely not! I’m assumingly speaking for most people in general. I’ll do my best to make sure I’m the only asshole in my assumptions
I’m a 36G and wear the bra because it’s super annoying to have them sway when I walk. That’s the main reason for me. I find it more comfortable to be braless, but I really shouldn’t do it in public. It’s attracts more attention than I usually want.
This is why I prefer winter, I can wear my bulky coat and go as braless as I want, despite the 40J I’m suppose to wear
38H (UK sizing) here.
I still don’t go braless even in winter because they hang low, and that embarrasses me. Existing at all embarrasses me, so take that with a grain of salt.
Existing is agony, but I just can’t care anymore what people think about my tits. I’m the one who has to wear them, and bras hurt (well, I’m autistic and they hit a lot of my brain hurting points) so screw it, I’m going to the wawa in a winter coat and no cares.
Without a bra, you risk getting a harmonic resonant swing going, and toppling over like the Tacoma Narrows bridge.
Having 36G breasts, does it cause back pain? If so, how do you manage it?
It caused more paint when I was wearing ill fitting bras in both size and shape. I found r/abrathatfits in my mid-twenties and it changed everything for me. I mostly wear unlined mid coverage demi bra shapes now.
I do still get back pain like just below the shoulder blades in the center of my back. But that’s been there for years and I’m used to it now
Thanks for sharing!
Make:
- Bouncy things less bouncy
- Pokey things less pokey
- Gravity less gravit-y
I’m thinking this guy has never seen real tits in real life, a teenager, or both. Or just blazed, that I can respect hahahah.
I got stoned enough to forget my age a few months ago… not like for a moment… I consciously focused on it for 15 minutes, couldn’t figure it out, kept pondering the rest of the night and couldn’t remember until the next morning…
I am old enough to occasionally forget my age, not to literally not be able to recall it… so I can empathize if bro is just waaay too stoned to comprehend the concept of a bra haha
I am someone who has had very large breasts and fairly small breasts in my lifetime. When my boobs were big, wearing bras was manageability and comfort. They were heavy and hurt my back and were always in the way. In addition, it was hard to do any sports or be active without being, what I called, double strapped: having a bra with a sports bra over the top. This is how I got through high school.
Now that I’ve both had a breast reduction and lost a lot of weight, my boobs are smaller and I don’t wear a bra often. When I do, it’s a vanity thing, I think my boobs look better under some clothes when wearing a bra, and a utility thing, like when I’m working out or doing something strenuous. Also, I wear one when I’m at work because it seems more appropriate.
Breasts can get heavy, and the sensation of gravity constantly pulling down on the skin of your chest and on your soft tissue can be very uncomfortable. If you get sweaty, moisture can get trapped underneath and cause rashes or fungal infections. Moving about, they can get in the way of your arm movements and if jumping or running the movement can be downright painful. Imagine piercing your ears with heavy weights and then shaking your head. You would want to minimize their movement!
Historically, women have used woven cloth bandeaus, breast bands, belts, straps, stays, corsets, bralets, bodices and all sorts of things to try to minimize movement and support breast tissue. Bras are just the most common contemporary thing.
So with all you mentioned (and please don’t misunderstand my intention for asking. I truly am unaware) does it cause damage to the actually mammary glands in the breast? Or are you just referring to skin deep damage?
It can cause some damage, in that the tissues inside the breast can lengthen and lose their firmness. It doesn’t damage function in any way but it could be considered premature aging. There’s that photo series of the white woman with the African tribeswomen and they’re comparing their breasts,
NSFW
because the African women were so interested in how her breasts were a different shape than theirs. If you’ve seen pictures of people from cultures who don’t wear clothing that supports breasts, you can see the difference in shape that constantly fighting against gravity makes.
If you’ve seen pictures of people from cultures who don’t wear clothing that supports breasts, you can see the difference in shape that constantly fighting against gravity makes.
There are a lot of factors that can contribute to sagging, but bralessness doesn’t seem to be one. There are studies indicating that bras likely weaken breast tissue over time, making sagging more likely in people who wear them regularly. Of course, even those studies are tricky to generalize to the broader population because of how many factors there are to control for (breast size, pregnancies, tobacco use, genes, etc etc etc). What we do know is that the difference in breast shape from one whole ethnic group to another is largely attributable to genetics, and as for the photo: those women simply have very different bodies.
Interestingly, photos of African women have been used countless times throughout history to dishonestly market bras to fashionable Westerners. The image of African women who simply have a different body type from their own has frightened millions of white ladies into bras.
Hmm I didn’t know that, thanks for the info. There’s probably a major factor of sample bias in that perception too, as Western women who wear bras and whose breasts naturally look like the African women’s wouldn’t be recognized as being similar, unless you’re intimate or sharing a home. It seems I fell for the propaganda, or “bra-paganda”, if you will.
I know exactly what you’re talking about, and again please excuse my ignorance and bluntness, but saggy boobs don’t necessarily mean lack of milk production?
Correct, in fact size, shape, perkiness, all of the cosmetic factors seem to have no correlation to milk production. The major factors for an individual’s milk supply seem to be age, genetics, stress and hormone levels.
No I have another question about Perkiness, but I’ll throw that question at my wife. Thanks for the info!
Size of boobs has no bearing on milk production. We all have the same equipment in there, more or less, most of the difference in breast size is just fat. I never got big boobs while nursing and made so much milk, it’s made on demand when the baby nurses, not stored in the boobs!
- sports: chest binding
- aesthetics: style choices
- modesty: cultural views
So there is a fascinating historical rabbit hole here that I went down a few years ago. I think it is Nicole Rudolph who did a deep dive video into the history of bras and other shapewear. If you smoked a lot and like history I recommend it.
Bras and similar garments give the proper ‘shape’ for the clothes and cultural norms of the moment, and give people comfort and support if they need it. Lots of people need something sturdy to keep everything in place, but it’s also still a very grey area of social acceptance to choose not wear one.Also when I run they bounce in a constrained manor.
boobies
Can’t speak for all, but back pain and comfort. Also, large breasts can have difficulty getting air under there which can cause irritations. Sometimes it’s just to keep your breasts off your stomach. I wear sports bras and have “special” bras, but my hatred of bras has really dimished when I accepted sports bra life.
I also just don’t like them “loose?” Like, I don’t want to bend over and have them go awol, even if I’m at home. Also, can store stuff in the bra and I have dropped my phone on the floor thinking I had a bra to catch it 😭
