In WW2, Allied researchers were trying to figure out how to reduce the number of their planes that were shot down. They found that most of the planes that returned had extensive damage in the wings and tail, so they decided to add armor to the wings and tail.
Then a Jewish scientist named Abraham Wald stepped in. He said to ignore the wings and tail, because the planes that got hit in the wings and tail still made it home to base. Armor the ENGINE. Planes hit in the engine crashed and never made it home to base, so they were never counted. That’s survivorship bias.
So when someone tells you, “ugh if only I could find a man who keeps a clean house” or “I would love to be with a woman who mows the lawn” well…you’re not dating those people. You never date those people.
So, maybe…no you don’t? Maybe the sloppy man and the lazy woman get to home base all the time for a reason.
Maybe stop asking what people think they want, and instead look at what they choose.
They also stopped dating them at some point apparently, so I’m not sure what you are trying to say. It’s not like the early stages of dating usually involve mowing the lawn or cleaning the house together so that’s something you only find out after having already found plenty of other things to like about this person.
I mean, I do know girls who dated an endless string of painfully handsome guys who spent all their free time in the gym and taking selfies only to find out that they were shallower than a mud puddle and couldnt keep their dick in their pants.
But kept doing it.