Humanity would absolutely be the abuser in this toxic relationship
I’ve played too much XCOM to know how this really turns out.
So 95% chance it turns out really really well.
SO WE’RE ALL GOING TO DIEEEEE
This is the type of shit I wish I was creative enough to come up with
I for one welcome our benevolent and generous alien overlords.
We need the Vulcans.
I think by “fix”, they don’t mean repair, but it would help.
Good news is that by dumping teratons of CO2 into the atmosphere we’re changing the spectroscopic signature in a way that makes it clear that we’re intelligent life that needs a some help.
Bad news is that it might also kill us before they get here.
It’s referring to the whales. And no, it doesn’t look good for humans.
Aliens: “As your punishment for what you did to the whales, your species will be enslaved according to Galactic Enslavement Code. You will ONLY be allotted Housing, Healthcare, Food an-”
Humans: “OH FUCKING FINALLY”
Aliens: “Wut”
No, no you can’t. We turn the oceans into acid and are collectively one torn paper bag away from starting a nuclear war.
Best you can do is containing the amalgamation of insanity called mankind on this planet. Because if we make it off this world, we will probably hunt you down for fun.
You have been warned.
(wontfix)
issue closed
Dat closing double-quote though…
Please fix me alien mommy
Please, we can’t do it by ourselves (because mega-important money)
“We started years ago with anal probes and now they seem to do it to themselves all the time. Now for Phase 2…”
I enjoy BBQ grey.