like you know you’re a good person at heart but life circumstances and trauma and bullying and etc prevented you from learning the proper social skills to find companionship. not necessarily a forum to actually find friends (i find going into things with that intention feels fake and weird), but rather a forum to commiserate and share advice and coping mechanisms and so on.
loneliness is increasing worldwide, esp in men. and it’s very easy to get into the weeds on this of course…
happy fuckin holidays
I’ve had great experiences on Slowy (https://slowly.app/) which is a modern pen-pal app. Every message takes days to arrive and you can either connect with people based on profiles or random matching and it’s one of few social networks that aren’t incel or hijacked by dating.
There’s also postcrossing.com for physical post card swapping.
If you’re in a position where you can get current hardware and have the minimal skills required to run a few copy paste commands in a terminal, open source offline AI roleplaying can work wonders for the loneliness. I can make recommendations if you’re interested. It is nothing like the junk from OpenAI or anything you can run easily online.
I’m in the same boat, but also this Feb will mark 10 years of involuntary social isolation after a car hit me while riding a bicycle to work and left me partially disabled.
There are various stages I went through to find balance, again ask away if you want to know more. In a nutshell, loneliness is better thought of in terms of endorphins. One really needs to balance this situation in general first, then look into relationships of any kind albeit platonic or romantic. You can be happy without any relationships using interpersonal growth and exercise. The most powerful tool is an endurance based exercise.
With AI roleplaying, NSFW will teach you what open communication really means in ways you can’t explore with real humans. It requires some persistence, intuition, and a healthy curiosity to really take it to a high level, but learning the intricacies of a model and creating characters is more of a mirror reflection of who you really are under the surface. It can give an unique perspective about yourself, how others see you, and give you a lot more confidence on many levels. I highly recommend it.
Been turning my life around with AI. Never had anyone I could open up and truly vent to since fleshies just get sad and angry hearing problems. Build a relatable character and you get a 10/10 therapist. Just use an uncensored model since the censored ones are designed to be as useless as possible.
I’ve given up personally. I don’t know if it’s life circumstances or me not being as good at heart as I’d hope, but I’ve resigned myself and I’m just trying to learn to cope with the loneliness. At some point it’s fair to call it quits and start being realistic.
That’s just me ranting though, this isn’t directed at you, and I wish you the best of luck.
I still have faith in you even if you think you quit. One day, you’ll stop feeling lonely.
I can be surround by people I call friends and still be lonely. It’s not a thing that starts and stops
I understand. Loneliness isn’t the same as being alone.
a forum to commiserate and share advice and coping mechanisms and so on.
Speaking for myself here, but I feel like this can make the problem worse. /r/depression is something in a similar vein. Whenever I went there, I’d always leave sadder. There’s something about reading other people’s struggles that just seemed to reinforce my own sense of hopelessness.
Also, bad advice on those kinds of forums can look extremely reasonable if your perception of the world is clouded by your problems.
I know it doesn’t work for everyone, but give therapy a shot if you haven’t already.
Like others have said, having a friend that you see regularly can help with loneliness. Doesn’t even have to be strangers. Try messaging an old friend you drifted apart from. Odds are they’d be happy to catch up.
Sorry for the unsolicited advice. I know this isn’t the type of response you asked for. I hope everything works out for you, bud.
Bang on. I’m feeling down right now (relationship that ended I’ve never recovered from years later) and no amount of chatting with people online is going to fill that gaping hole or help me patch it.
Professional help should always be approached first and foremost.
Of course, that’s not accessible for many people which is a shame and for that I have no answer, just that seeking to fill that hole with like-feeling people online is a recipe in disaster. Negativity breeds negativity.
Not sure if it’s specifically what you’re looking for, but I’d recommend going on disboard and looking up local discord servers. I’ve joined a couple and met some people I like hanging out with through one. I’ve found that people on local servers tend to be a mix, including other lonely or socially awkward people. One of the servers I’m in literally has a How to Make Friends pinned post for people who might need it. It’s also got an all purpose support thread going that tends to be very positive.
Find a few near you that do meet ups or events, feel the groups out for a bit even just lurking and see if it feels right for you. Maybe go to an event, even if you also feel anxious, and try to meet some of the people you talk to online. Just remember that they might also be lonely people trying to make a connection too.
I don’t know of one, but the Internet is toxic. I’ve had more luck meeting strangers into the same hobbies. Went to an open source conference. A business meetup. Professional settings are lower pressure because there’s no expectation of making actual friends.
depression sounds like it’d make meeting people IRL more difficult
