That property has more rights and protections than people do.
The value of human life, in reality, is much lower than I thought it would be.
Laws and rights are only as good as the people & mechanisms that enforce them. A piece of paper doesn’t protect you, people do.
That people often prefer a comforting delusion over the truth, even if it hurts them in the long run.
you don’t have to make a living from the thing you enjoy most in life, in fact it’s sometimes better not to.
That I will never enjoy the taste of wine.
I figured out I would never like coffee in my teens, and had the same realization about beer in my 20s.
But it wasn’t until this year, in my mid-thirties, that I finally accepted that I don’t like the taste of wine and probably never will. After years of trying the full spectrum of wines, I had to admit that it wasn’t the “notes” that were turning me off, nor was it a problem with the quality of the wine. It was the fundamental “wine-ness” that I disliked, the same as I don’t like the “beer-ness” of beer or the “coffee-ness” of coffee.
I’ve never quite gotten into wine either. I like most stouts and porters. Bit anything too hopy in my bear and it’s going in the sink. Shame with the whole IPA revolution going on. Other than that cider and cocktails are the only thing I really enjoy consuming. Everything from the sweet Swedish Briska to the most fermented fresh pressed apple cider goes down without much problem.
Not all rich people are smart, and not all smart people are rich. Seems kind of obvious to me now, but it took me a long time to comprehend this.
It’s OK to only do what you KNOW you are capable of doing. Too many people hurt themselves trying to push themselves too hard, when they just aren’t ready yet.
Don’t buy the cow if you’re lactose intolerant.
Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free
Dad was not lying on top of mum to squash her.
No matter how much 6yr old me was complaining after entering their room early one morning.
Probably would’ve been nice to know I was trans a few years younger but I started hormones at 20 as did a friend my age who came out at 16, so like it probably would’ve been less consequential than much.
The importance of studying. And related, calculus and how electricity works. Both would’ve saved me a lot of money to have learned 6 months earlier.
Also how to say no to someone trying to negotiate your boundaries and use your kindness to push you into a relationship. I should’ve walked away the second she said she wanted to negotiate my no and that she wasn’t going to give up on pursuing me. That situation fucked me up and wasn’t even the first time someone with insufficiently controlled bpd wound up pressuring me into romantic/sexual situations I wasn’t comfortable with by making it harder to say no than to give what they wanted.
That in spite of doing my best to care for their mother as she slipped into the madness of depression and alzheimers before dieing last year, that they care about my sacrifice because no one other than me or my brother cared enough about her to help with her care(we did the best we could I know it wasnt enough but at least we were there for her)
But they get to keep her money after kicking us out of the house and selling everything she had so thats cool right?
That it’s never too late!
No matter how hard you try, how loud you cry, some people will never change.
When someone is abusive or hurtful to you, 90% of the time it’s not your fault. It’s that there is something wrong or something broken in them. They are malfunctioning and it’s necessary to understand that.
The other 10%… Well, own that and fix your mistake.
But a very large majority of the time, it’s them being broken and wrong.
For me it’s been rough accepting that I’m absolute bpd bait. I struggle to hold boundaries and am happy to help people in need. Add in a trusting nature and yeah I’m still learning how not to get abused.
Figuring out abusive relationships for me was hard because I knew friends with good intentions, and gave valid criticism but were absolutely brutal about it.
Now I very rarely associate with very insecure people. They are always looking to “prove” themselves, often by putting others down.
They can’t just accept someone’s accomplishment, they have to go “well actually you got help from so and so…” And always try to undermine your achievements. Extremely mentally exhausting people.
Not too late but later than I should have:
- To seek professional mental health help
- To understand that Bisexuality really exists. Growing up and in my teens in media and pop culture it’s seemed that you either were gay or straight, no other option.
And that being gay was bad. It was not conveyed well in our media, and our culture was fun of negative connotations with no-heterosexuality. I feel you on this one. Bi people exist, and we’re everywhere!
Dynamic programming. I should have just chased a check rather than trying to save the world
Basic necessities arent a given and one should b grateful for em
Grateful to who?
The people who give them to you?
I think you can just be grateful to have or experience something. Like you can’t be grateful to anyone for a full moon, but you can be grateful that you saw it.