Quality shitpost.
Half of this are wrong though
It’s a guide for stupid people written by stupid people. I bet they’ll call you “woke” if you order a cappuccino there.
Excuse me, but I have had a lot of tea and I can confirm that it is not coffee.
Espresso is also not coffee.
Right, a flat white is definitely not white.
A latte is also a white coffee, and most baristas are going to think you want an americano with milk.
espressocompressed coffeeCoffee^2
Coffee.tar.gz
tar -xvzf Coffee.tar.gz americano
For anyone that sees espresso and thinks express, as in something fast, it’s actually meant to be pressed, as it’s an Italian term. So that’s hot water that went through pressed coffee powder.
Espresso makes me Expresso.
So that’s hot water that went through pressed coffee powder.
The “pressed” doesn’t refer to the coffee powder but to the water: the water is pressed through the coffee grounds using high pressure (around 9 bars or so).
Ops, my mistake!
It also means express in italian. It’s a pun. The reason it was invented was to make coffee brewing faster so coffee breaks wouldn’t take so long.
You espress it?
Si
I will not be ordering a “chalky coffee”.
It’s a “choccy (chocolate) coffee”
Flat white, cappuccino, latte and machiatto are the same thing. It’s just coffee with milk.
All mammals are the same thing, just carbon life forms
Carbon lifeforms with milk. Get it right.
Pizza, cream cheese bagel, and cheese on crackers are the same thing. It’s just bread with cheese.
They forgot to list the Jackson, which is a coffee that starts out Black but turns White
This has been '90s comedy night, ladies and gentlemen! Thanks for coming and be sure to tip your waitstaff!
This is just bacon style marketing.
Espressoconcentrated coffeeThat’s just “Other nonsense” e.g. whats wrong with Tea and Hot Chocolate?
It isn’t coffee.
That’s about a -31 on the “what kind of coffee is this” scale.
They are coffee extremists, but from the other side of the spectrum.
Equally or even more annoying than the “Venti Caramel Ribbon Crunch Frappuccino, extra cream, pinch of pumpkin spice, …” crowd. Since that side at least doesn’t force their views on coffee on other people.
If I ask for a latte, and you give me a coffee with milk, I’m gonna be upset. There’s a big difference between steamed milk and just milk.
I ordered an almond joy latte and went back in asking for another drink cause it was horrible.
Turns out it was a coffee not a drink. I hadn’t had coffee in so long I couldn’t identify the lack of steamed milk. 🫤
I did get it remade as a latte and it was amazing.
If I ask for latte, and you give me a coffee with milk, I’m gonna be upset. There’s a big difference between milk and coffee with milk.
You do know that when you steam milk it changes the consistency, right? It’s like the difference between a coke and a completely flat coke.
Isn’t a latte non-steamed though? I thought a cappuccino had the frothed milk in it.
“Latte” is milk, “Caffè latte” is coffee with milk
In Italy, sure, but the sign looks to be from an American coffee shop, so “latte” doesn’t mean just milk in this context.
True, however - as I replied to a similar remark - the (presumably humorous) comment that keeps getting downvoted is technically correct
If by technically correct, you mean only correct if you mix languages, then sure. But afaik, this thread is in English.
Understood, but in the context of a coffee shop in an anglophone place it has a different agreed upon meaning.
True, however the (presumably humorous) comment that keeps getting downvoted is technically correct
A latte is espresso with steamed milk.
With a latte, it’s just normal steamed milk. A cappuccino has foamy steamed milk. Specifically, it has an equal volume of steamed milk and foam taking up space in the cup. You get more actual milk diluting the coffee in a latte, resulting in a milder drink.
Thank you for the correction.
I thought they were making a joke, in that latte means milk and that it’s “cafe latte” in Italy or something.
Yeah, I think they were, but also if I ask for a latte in an English speaking coffee shop and get a glass of milk, I’d be upset.
I thought flat white and latte were synonyms and they both meant milky coffee. Now I’m confused, so it’s just the foam?
Flat white is always made with some milk foam on top, traditionally less than a Latte.
So the difference should be in the ratio of coffee to milk to froth, which is also true of other varieties like cortado.
Flat white is 2 espresso shots and equal parts steamed milk. A Latte is more steamed milk (idk the exact ratio if there is one), most places just fill up whatever latte cup they have which should be bigger than the flat white cup, and has a small amount of head/foam.
caffeine in suppository formass coffeeBoofaccino
For all you coffee snobs hear me this!
Affogato!
Get a scoop of vanilla ice cream. Pour a shot of espresso over it. Heaven!!I don’t like coffee but I think this could be the gateway drug.
It is. Vanilla ice cream with coffee is delicious.
You get the warm bitter espresso then the cool sweet vanilla icecream. You need to eat it quick while it melts then drink it when it combines into a coolish sweet coffee thing.
Its fantastic and so simple.
But where’s the Cortado?
