I just kind of wonder with how casually people express these thoughts. It’s a little disturbing how normalized it is to entertain such notions, given how other types of fantasies are very stigmatized.

Like when discussing char.ai, acting out sexual or romantic fantasies is something a lot of people do, but it’s considered embarrassing. While people freely discuss violent roleplays without any shame.

And then there’s the cliche of fantasizing about killing one’s boss or coworkers.

Are these really common thoughts for mentally sound people to have?

  • Angry_Autist (he/him)@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    If you’re worried, have a Hare test done. It’s a question and answer survey that helps diagnose sociopathy.

    Personally I have a hypothesis that humanity has invisibly specialized, like ants. Hundreds of thousands of years of living in very dangerous environments with people living a few miles away that constantly want to kill you and take your food.

    This has led to a mentally prepared warrior caste that will be less likely to fall to fear or panic in combat (of course this is natural selection, only the surviving warriors get to reproduce)

    And I am thinking part of that is, as you experience, these violent fantasies.

    You aren’t having them because you are mentally ill, you are having them because your ancestors evolved over thousands of generations to have more Fight than Flee in your emergency response.

    Unfortunately that means your brain is geared for violence, like mine.

    Were we born 400 years ago we might have been lauded heroes, but in our modern safe world we are relics that society wants to forget.

    • Don_Dickle@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      OP Is ok. Don’t tell me that you have not had a dick of a boss that was cruel to you and thought about ways to kill the SOB. The thoughts are fine but putting it into action is a whole different thing.

      • Fonzie!@ttrpg.network
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        3 months ago

        Dick of a boss? Yes.
        Thought of shouting at him, telling how I feel? Yes.
        Thought of brutally murdering him? No.

      • FlashMobOfOne@lemmy.world
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        3 months ago

        Maybe that “sadistic” qualifier sets some apart, but I don’t think anyone can be human and not have a violent fantasy about someone.

        For instance, most of us experience bullying in some way, and I can’t imagine there’s a single human being that didn’t want to react violently in some way.

        It’s just part of being human.

  • AwkwardLookMonkeyPuppet@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    Yes, it’s perfectly normal. It’s important to acknowledge that the more you indulge particular thoughts or fantasies, the more they become a part of your core personality, so it’s important to hold your thoughts captive, and form yourself into the type of person you want to be.

  • RightHandOfIkaros@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    I would say no, that is not normal.

    Its important to note that someone saying “I wish I could/ I would kill my [whoever],” that doesn’t usually mean anything beyond just “I am voicing my frustration with that person.” That doesn’t mean they have actually given the idea thought.

    If someone is actually thinking about killing or harming someone, please seek professional help.

  • atlas@sh.itjust.works
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    3 months ago

    Reading through these comments makes me worry about y’all and maybe the people I interact with on a daily basis.

    Like I would understand maybe punching someone to try and “convert” the emotional/mental pain they caused you into actual pain they can understand; to teach them a lesson or open their eyes. Take punching a nazi as an example.

    But having “violent sadistic fantasies” especially involving those close to you should probably invoke some level of concern about your mental state and warrant a psych eval.

    Put it this way, if you sat down in front of a therapist and told them what you just told us, would they warn the authorities after the appointment or just go about their day?

    • aramova@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      Put it this way, if you sat down in front of a therapist and told them what you just told us, would they warn the authorities after the appointment or just go about their day?

      That’s why you don’t do that…

  • hendrik@palaver.p3x.de
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    3 months ago

    Hmm, the human mind is very complex. So there are all kinds of things. I’m not having these thoughts involving actual people. But I can let my creativity run free and imagine all kinds of fantasies. I also read books and picture things. Or watch movies that contain violence. But I separate that from reality. With that said… There are things like intrusive thoughts. A lot of people for example report being haunted by the intrusive thought, they could (while driving) at any time yank the steering wheel, crash into that concrete bridge pier and die. That might be uncomfortable. I think it’s called “L’appel du vide” or “the call of the void”. But I think it’s connected to the brains ability to weigh options, picture outcomes and assess risks. We can also assess dark scenarios. That in itself isn’t bad. But it becomes an issue once you lose control or it starts affecting things. Same applies to other disturbing thoughts/fantasies. I’d be super careful if it involves real people. But I mean we do that. We sometimes also fantasize about positive things. Like having sex with someone who is out of reach. Maybe that’s practically the same thing. But it comes with issues.

    So yeah, I’d say things like that happen to mentally sound people. It depends on the extent and how you deal with it. And there isn’t anything like a “mentally sound” person in my opinion. Most people I’ve met are crazy (in a good way) one way or another. And life isn’t strictly one thing or another, either.

    One thing that makes me worried though, is you mentioning the word “sadistic”. I can’t relate to that. I’m not sure if it’s a common (or healthy) feeling. I think I’ve never experienced any urge to be sadistic towards any living being.

  • Don_Dickle@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    Lol me and my gf used to play this game when we went into public areas. And we would decide how they would die. Than it bore down into who would you eat first on a desert island with no food.

  • Fleppensteyn@feddit.nl
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    3 months ago

    It’s normal to get such weird brainfarts, like the call of the void or imagining murder or other bad things, just like when a song suddenly gets stuck in your head. A healthy person thinks “wtf brain?” but when you start to think “that’s a great idea I want to act on”, maybe that’s not completely normal.

  • carl_dungeon@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    There’s a big difference between thinking/imagining something and acting on it. I wouldn’t consider it an issue unless it’s causing damage to your life or relationships. Fixating on morbid stuff to the point that it impacts your life is probably a sign of something bigger going on.

  • listless@lemmy.cringecollective.io
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    3 months ago

    From the Intrusive Thoughts Wikipedia Page:

    Many people experience the type of negative and uncomfortable thoughts that people with more intrusive thoughts experience, but most people can dismiss these thoughts.[7] For most people, intrusive thoughts are a “fleeting annoyance”.[8] Psychologist Stanley Rachman presented a questionnaire to healthy college students and found that virtually all said they had these thoughts from time to time, including thoughts of sexual violence, sexual punishment, “unnatural” sex acts, painful sexual practices, blasphemous or obscene images, thoughts of harming elderly people or someone close to them, violence against animals or towards children, and impulsive or abusive outbursts or utterances.[9] Such thoughts are universal among humans, and have “almost certainly always been a part of the human condition”.

  • DarkThoughts@fedia.io
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    3 months ago

    Like when discussing char.ai, acting out sexual or romantic fantasies is something a lot of people do, but it’s considered embarrassing. While people freely discuss violent roleplays without any shame.

    Violence is culturally normalized, while sexual things are usually shamed and censored. We can see this a lot in different media, especially the US is very big on that part.

    And then there’s the cliche of fantasizing about killing one’s boss or coworkers.

    Never heard of that and I’d say that’s downright sociopathic. I think the only time I had seriously violent thoughts were about my cheating ex girlfriends, and there was a lot of shit that came along with that, that I’m not going to go into here. Let’s just say it was very traumatic and accordingly caused a lot of very different thoughts in general. But casually having fantasies about killing people? Nah dawg. That’s when you get a therapist.