I am a lazy piece of shit.
I’d like to learn some programming, morse code, perhaps another language as well.
But I quickly loose any motivation. At least for the past 2 years. I do get some occasional bursts of motivation, but usually I often don’t feel like doing anything at all anymore. I wouldn’t even breathe if it wasn’t automatic.
Preferably I’d be dead. I’d have 0 issues, create 0 issues, have no regrets. It would be better for everyone, myself included.
Hey I’ve definitely been in your place before. What got me learning coding skills was motivation for a career change, a platform that worked for me (Udemy), and accepting my failed attempts. Small bursts of motivation are more than what most people have. Utilizing them when they come on are opportunities to get a lot done in short periods of time. Don’t dedicate yourself to paths that don’t appeal to you, half the fun is figuring out what kind things make you tick.
As far as wanting to be dead, existentialism is always a painful bitch. Reading Marcus Aurelius’ Meditations helped me alot. It doesn’t take away pain, but can help cultivate core reasons for one’s actions. That helps with existing, at least for me.
Get yourself checked your for adhs or similar executive functioning disorders. It’s the must frustrating thing in the world to want to do something and not being able to get into gear.
Learning.
I am a lazy piece of shit.
I’d like to learn some programming, morse code, perhaps another language as well.
But I quickly loose any motivation. At least for the past 2 years. I do get some occasional bursts of motivation, but usually I often don’t feel like doing anything at all anymore. I wouldn’t even breathe if it wasn’t automatic.
Preferably I’d be dead. I’d have 0 issues, create 0 issues, have no regrets. It would be better for everyone, myself included.
Hey I’ve definitely been in your place before. What got me learning coding skills was motivation for a career change, a platform that worked for me (Udemy), and accepting my failed attempts. Small bursts of motivation are more than what most people have. Utilizing them when they come on are opportunities to get a lot done in short periods of time. Don’t dedicate yourself to paths that don’t appeal to you, half the fun is figuring out what kind things make you tick.
As far as wanting to be dead, existentialism is always a painful bitch. Reading Marcus Aurelius’ Meditations helped me alot. It doesn’t take away pain, but can help cultivate core reasons for one’s actions. That helps with existing, at least for me.
Don’t beat yourself up.
Get yourself checked your for adhs or similar executive functioning disorders. It’s the must frustrating thing in the world to want to do something and not being able to get into gear.