Am American living in the city with 8 chickens. The only scary thing is seeing eggs in the market go for $10/dozen
10$/dozen? Where?
I’d love to see this city that only has 8 chickens in it
I don’t know what you’re doing, but the way you can turn a phrase around is remarkable. You’ve gotten a few chuckles outta me this morning.
I love you too 😊
Only 10? They’re $13 where i live
And here I thought $2 was a bit too much.
Wow, that’s crazy. It’s €4.49/10 here tax included for the fancy free range, low volume farm ones from a not-cheap supermarket.
3.2USD here for a dozen cage-free brown eggs!
My folks’ chickens’ eggs have orange-r yolks tho.
Farm fresh eggs here in Amish country go for $2/doz.
Miss living near the Amish. They have these cute big families with so many children and agricultural stuff for low prices. I would love to convince them to somehow some way homestead in my city.
Funny, as someone who works intimately with them I find myself distrusting them. They are great at putting on the “old timey, super genuine sweet Christian folk” persona but don’t get it wrong. Their ideology spreads like a cancer around here. They breed like crazy, buy up all the private land, displace other locals with their farms, eschew environmentally friendly agricultural practice to save money, their buggies destroy the roads and cause terrible fatal accidents. It’s not to say they’re all bad but they’re absolutely a highly insular cult and they have no problem turning on outsiders to further their society.
displace other locals with their farms, es
Meh I am not sure how people stuck on old tech are so much better at farming that they can outcompete modern farms. How bad at your job can you be to have your ass handed to you by the 17th century?
Kinda getting tired of the whole “my life sucks because I am lazy let me get angry at people who are actually successful”. Tall poppy syndrome is running rampant, especially in rural America. You can thank me for paying for your roads btw.
buggies destroy the roads
How? I’d always heard that heavier vehicles do more damage to roads, so I’d expect buggies to be on par with bicycles or maybe motorcycles.
cause fatal accidents
I’m curious about this one, too. Do they tend to drive erratically? I’d think their slower top speeds would make it easier to avoid accidents.
Huh, they’re like $2.19 a dozen for me.
I want my eggs washed because I deal with enough shit, literal and metaphorical, in my every day life, that I dont want to start my day off with it during breakfast.
Plenty of Americans have chickens in their backyard. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
can confirm, am shook
I have a picture of my receipt for an incredibly reasonably-priced ECG scan I had the other day if you like? I think it was €9
DOES NOT COMPUTE
I know right?
I thought it’d be free fucksake
You pay for your ECGs?
drops monocle
I know right, why are we so uptight? Who wouldn’t want their eggs covered in crusty vaginal residue and dirty feathers? THAT’S WHAT REALLY SEALS IN THE FLAVOR!!! 🤢🤢🤢🤮
Most of us in Europe don’t eat the shells, actually.
Then again, who wouldn’t want their eggs washed off with god knows what kind of chemicals that remove the natural protective membrane from the shells, so now you have to store the eggs in the fridge rather than just the shelf?
Are you eating the shell?
Never! I always crack eggs PERFECTLY so that it splits cleanly in half with no shards and the egg inside never touches the outside of the shell… 😰
He’s eating the shells, guys
There’s actually a membrane on the inside of the shell, I didn’t learn to crack an egg in half cleanly until a few years ago.
If you shatter a bit of the side, you can take both hands and pull it apart with both hands… It’s hard to describe, but you grab all the fragments with your fingers and then rip the membrane. It gets goop on your fingertips and a handful of shell shards, but it’s extremely easy to get all the shards, and the insides don’t come near the shell.
Instead of learning to get the force right, you can drop it 4-6 inches flat onto a countertop and it’ll break the shell without breaking the membrane
You could also wash it if you’re really worried, I wash my hands every time I touch egg goop anyways. It’s also probably about to be cooked, so it’s not like it’s a health risk.
But they taste better and last much longer… even unrefrigerated. I always get fresh local eggs when I get the chance, it’s worth the initial grossness (I was very skeptical at first, but after I ate the first one I got over it)
I mean, you can just wash the egg before cooking with it, like you do with potatoes or other vegetables.
I’m not overly bothered by the need to refrigerate my eggs, but also it wouldn’t bother me to rinse crap off one more ingredient before cooking.
You have to lick your fingers after handling them like it’s cheeto dust.
As an American, I cannot legally touch any egg that hasn’t been ultra-pasteurized followed by continuous cold chain refrigeration and served in either a Styrofoam or pulped paper cardboard egg carton.
“Y’all’s eggs AREN’T chlorine washed? Ewww unsanitary”
I think you have been misinformed. As an American, I can harvest eggs just like the pictured ones from my own backyard on a regular basis.
They don’t even cost any money, they come out of chicken asses for free.
This instantly reminded me of an old Mitchell and Webb sketch lol
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What a noob. Ours come from shops. That way, our entire fuckin garden doesn’t smell like a crashed ammonia tanker
As a side note, if your chicken coop smells like a crashed ammonia tanker you need to add more carbon in the coop. Dead leaves, cardboard, shredded wood or wood chips are working well.
Sorry your yard is so small. Mine is large enough that the chicken coop is far away from the house and is usually not a bother. Summertime when the wind is just wrong can be an annoying stench, but it’s almost nothing compared to the smell of dumpsters in a big city during summer heat.
We call our yards “metres” and they’re a little bit bigger than yours
Off topic pedantry, great response
Sir, this is a
Wendy’sshitpost community.Learn to live a little.
You have no idea how big I can live. What if I told you that I knew a guy who can turn you into a walrus?
Let’s not pretend the acquisition and upkeep of chickens is free… if you eat a lot of eggs it is absolutely worth it, but there is some cost in setting up a coop, getting chickens, keeping chickens fed and safe from predators, disease, etc.
Plus you have to have property to keep them on and be allowed to have them on your property. For most Americans that isn’t possible due to lack of home ownership or HOA restrictions on what animals you can have on “your” property. (HOAs are bullshit)
You must have weird chickens. My lay eggs out if their cloaca.
Isn’t their asshole like inside the cloaca?
Their colon is. The coloaca is their asshole, and pee hole, and egg hole.
Pedantic response, thanks for the great contribution
This is pulped paper cardboard, is it not?
Your pulped paper cardboard.
It’s so nice of you to gift it to them!
I just noticed the mistake and I knew one of you smart asses was going to call me out before I message to fix it :(
Hah, jokes on you. I’m a DUMBass. :p
You message to fix it? What, you have staff to do it for you?
Y’all are ruthless.
Except the ones with girlfriends called Ruth, obv
I don’t even know how the fuck that happened. I give up.
It’s ok. We still like you.
Not Americans that are used to eating farm fresh eggs from the local farmers market. I lived in downtown Austin until recently and getting freshly picked produce from local and urban farms every Saturday was one of my favorite parts of my week.
Hello I’m from the FBI and I’m on my way to disappear your local farmers thank you
Pwease mista FBI guy, weave my farmews awone UwU
Hello I’m from the FBI and I’m on my way to disappear your local farmers thank you
For those wondering wtf OP is talking about
- https://www.davidgumpert.com/confessions-of-a-raw-milk-undercover-agent-behind-the-scenes-with-investigator-brandow-in-ny-state (2007)
- https://grist.org/technology/food-five-tips-for-surviving-a-raid-on-your-farm-or-food-club/ (2010)
- https://web.archive.org/web/20120314001040/https://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2011/08/the-latest-raw-milk-raid-an-attack-on-food-freedom/243635/ (2011)
- https://americanmilitarynews.com/2024/01/video-govt-authorities-raid-organic-farm-seize-food-in-pennsylvania/ (2024)
Houston here, and same. There’s a bunch of smaller ones. Some get invaded by folks selling store bought things but I dig heading to the farmer’s market on weekends. All the meat I get is from small local farms as well.
Not everyone has that luxury due to cost and location. I know exactly how lucky I am to have so many options nearby, to be able to afford the slightly higher prices, and to have the time to go when they’re open.
No. It doesn’t.
…he typed, from underneath his bed
Can confirm. We (in US) have chickens and whenever we gift eggs to people they’re astounded that they don’t need to be refrigerated but also sometimes horrified that they aren’t washed.
Granted, I keep the eggs that get poopy for myself so they don’t get tossed out by an overly cautious person. I just rinse them immediately before use if they’re very dirty. Occasionally one of the hens will have an “accident” and lay an egg in the dirt outside or on the coop floor. Otherwise they look generally like the pic above.
I’ve yet to have a rotten egg and at times we’ve gotten behind by over a month… Still good, sitting on the counter for a month.
Fun info, I’m currently eating through some “water glassed” eggs that I stored in May of 2023. Still good.
I have looked up “water glassed eggs” and while it does look interesting as a scientific experiment, I’m reasonably certain that you’re a psychopath
Hahah yeah water glassing is kind of a throwback that helps keep them even through temp variations. We did an experiment back when we had a homestead a few years ago, where we cleaned any nasties if there were any and then dipped the eggs in oil and kept them in a cool room.
We came back every three months to try an egg. We ended the experiment at 2 years after which 25% of them began to float. The rest were still edible but the yolk wouldn’t stay together when cracked.
Ah I see
Psychopath it is then
rofl fair enough
Yeah, at ~8 months these are about 50/50 on whether the yolks hold together. Still taste fine though.
I decided to give it a try since in the spring/summer they were laying way more than we could keep up with … But mostly because I thought it was interesting and wanted to try it :D
Am American. Used to have to get those eggs out from under the chickens who wanted to sit on them and get the shit pecked out of me before school everyday.
Am American
You could’ve shot the chickens first then, duh
They’re chicken, not fish. They obviously weren’t in a school.
Or a barrel
It doesn’t scare us, we want this. I’d love to see you win vs the chicken industry. They would stomp your ass to the ground like they do to all the chickens!
We don’t eat the donkey eggs
Ugh it came out the ass
But I eat ass for sport
If eating ass was a sport I’d know about it.
It is, but is not competitive yet. We are hoping to form a league.
That’s ridiculous, chickens don’t have asses. When’s the last time you went to KFC and ordered a bucket of wings, breasts, and asses?
Sidenote: my phone thnks the word breasts must be changed to breaststroke every time.
Silly every tgingat kfc is chicken asses.
The asses are like the sub-dogfood grade meat at taco bell. You don’t explicitly ask for it, but everyone just knows that’s what they are getting.
Unless I’ve been horribly misinformed, so does honey
It’s actually coming out of the cloaca. No idea about the chicken tho
Cloaca is its ass, just a multifunctional one
Is “Multifunctional Ass” the sequel to “Detachable Penis”?
No way a chicken would fit
The chicken comes out of the egg, the egg comes out of the cloaca
So I’ve thought about the chicken and the egg issue. Wouldn’t it be the egg first since it contained an evolved spices that we currently call the chicken? The one that produced it doesn’t have to be a chicken, only that it produced a mutated offspring whose egg contained the chicken.
Is the egg named after what laid it, or what it contains?
It’s more like the egg contained something slightly different from the mother, and that trend continues for thousands and thousands of “iterations” until eventually it’s completely distinct from that “first” one. There shouldn’t be any species that gives birth to something completely different where it’s protochicken straight to chicken.
That’s kinda what I’m getting at, in that at some point you draw the line on what is a “chicken” vs what isn’t a chicken.
You’re both misinformed. Honey doesn’t come either out of a bee’s anus nor out of a bee’s cloaca. It comes out of the mouth. Bees don’t even have a cloaca. Chickens though do have a cloaca and that’s where the eggs come out.
So where do the chickens produce honey from then, smartypants?
They get it from Aldi.
In the US, there’s a concern for salmonella or other bacteria and viruses. Factory egg farming is a horror show in regards to overcrowding and hygiene. Sick birds are crammed in with healthy laying birds, and washing the eggs is one of the safest ways to prevent contamination.
It does increase the permeability of the shell, decreasing shelf life and requiring refrigeration.
If your eggs looked like this in the USA, there’s a small but non-zero chance that you’ll shit yourself to death. Probably not, but it’s scary enough.
We could improve factory farming regulations so it’s not a like a Cronenberg movie, but then eggs would be more expensive. And even if we did, and stopped washing our eggs, Americans would still want them to look clean and would still keep them in the fridge because we’ve been conditioned to expect to die on the toilet covered in wet feces if we see bird poop on the eggs.
Chickens are vaccinated against salmonella (and a bunch of other things) when they are chicks in Europe. It means you don’t need to worry about shitting yourself to death, the chickens are slightly happier by not being sick, and your eggs stay fresher for longer.
It would probably add $0.005 per egg, so US producers will claim it’s communism if a regulation is brought in to vaccinate chicken, but it would be worth doing.
Fuckin finally. The tryna high road the Europe and shit like they don’t have poor chicken treatment situations too. Its all down to vaccination requirements. They the treatment of chickens cause both places have issues lol
Refrigerating the eggs end to end costs money too, possibly more. I don’t think it’s about ongoing cost but rather upfront cost to switching.
You mean you put 5G tracking devices in your chickens?
Really, though, getting poultry farmers to spend a penny per dozen eggs is like trying to squeeze water from a rock.
Yeah, it helps one find them if they run away
They’ve made a documentary about it back in the day:
They recently made a new one with up-to-date info on the security of those chickens
Keeping unwashed eggs in the fridge at home helps them last longer, as long as you don’t leave them out to sweat.
But yeah here in Sweden, we rarely ever get salmonella recalls since the chickens aren’t strapped to a box here.
Fwiw, the eggs wouldn’t have to be more expensive, the eggs cost what the market will pay.
The only change is that the people profiting from your poor food conditions will profit slightly less.
This is a common lie they tell everyone.
Just looked it up. Six shite-covered-but-perfectly-safe eggs
€1.55
They won’t profit less, line must go up. They’d charge double the difference and blame immigrants and Obama.
sure they could charge more, but the market wouldn’t swallow it so they would sell less. if they could charge more for eggs, they would be doing so right now, for extra profit.
They would collude. All eggs would go up just like during covid, and they wouldn’t lose any sales.
At what point do people not just think that maybe going vegan isn’t that bad of an alternative
Store bought anything is pretty bad nowadays, at least speaking as an American.
Produce often has listeria, ecoli, salmonella, etc outbreaks, it’s ridiculous. Extends to eggs, spinach, lettuce, radishes…anything. Going vegan doesn’t solve this problem unless you’re only eating what you grow at home.
But eggs are yummy. Baked goods, thickened sauces, omelettes and deviled eggs and egg salad, you can’t really replace them with vegan alternatives. Aquafaba is pretty close for some of it, but people like their eggs and don’t care about how much their food suffers before we eat it.
Right around lunch time it starts looking less appealing
It is way too challenging in my mind at least. I do one meat meal a week and veg the rest. All the fun stuff has milk and eggs in it.
But hey you do it if it makes you happy.
If your eggs looked like this in the USA, there’s a small but non-zero chance that you’ll shit yourself to death. Probably not, but it’s scary enough.
Unless you got it from your own chicken coop
Right, but if you keep chickens for eggs, you already know all of this.
No matter how hard you try.
Bits of that unwashed shell are getting in your food.
You say that like crispy shites are a bad thing
That’s ok. Our chickens aren’t half-dead, disease-ridden skeletons rotting in battery cages.
I still don’t get why you wouldn’t still put those eggs on the refrigerator. They will stay fresher longer!
They really don’t. I’ve tried both ways.
I don’t see how. In any case, I see zero advantage to NOT storing them in the fridge.
Fresh eggs at room temp will stay good for 2 - 4 weeks at room temperature, 3-6 months refrigerated. If you need to refrigerate fresh eggs, you have too many chickens
Eggs don’t instantly degrade from good to bad overnight. They slowly degrade with weakening membranes and what not. As I said, they stay freshER.
I get unwashed eggs from a farm whenever I can. I still put my eggs in the fridge. And the yolks stay nice and unbroken when making eggs over easy, as I like them.
And here I am, with my fridge-kept unwashed eggs, destroying each and every yolk with the spatula before flipping them over.
I love the juicy yolk exploding on the plate (or in my mouth). My other secret, besides fresh eggs, is to flip them without tools. https://youtu.be/OTlr2Y-nbc4?si=1uPHNAwHkV_HxV7T
